Gakuen Homestuck
by CrimsonCastle
Summary: Karkat Vantas rules the fucking school, with his best friend Roxy, and a total bitch named Vriska. Although, shit might start to change when he falls for some lame ass dude named Dave Strider. Will he drunkenly confess? Or is he gonna just totally flip his shit? A\N. This probably isn't going to be shippy, it is originally based off a joke...
1. Who's who A special occasion

**A\N. This is something stupid that came up while talking to my rp partner. All the characters\ relationships are based off of the rp characters relationships, although this isn't an rp, It's me being stupid. And yeah, they're probably gonna have "alices" shut up and don't judge me...**

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you rule this fucking school. You might as well be royalty here, seriously. With your best friend Roxy by your side, nothing can happen to change that. See, Roxy is this really amazingly popular and beautiful girl. She throws all the best parties, and it is a known fact that if you're not there, and you don't have a reasonable excuse like " Oh no, I had a fucking seisure" excuse not a " Sorry, family game night" excuse, you are automatically at the bottom of the food chain.

The only problem with Roxy, is she tends to come to class totally sloshed a lot, and then you have to come up with some lame ass story to keep her out of detention, again. You not only do this because she's your bestie, you also do this because if she's not there, you tend to hang around some really annoying guy that is way to into the whole touchy feely scene.

His name's Dave, and he's always wearing bright neon clothes, he even dies his fucking uniform to the point were it hardly counts anymore. Seriously, the guy is like a walking add for some anime clothing line, you can't even look at him without getting a headache. Not to mention the second he gets a look at you, or anyone really, he attacks, and by attack you mean random hugs and kisses.

Of course those aren't the only people in your life. You ARE Karkat fucking Vantas after all

Theres this girl, Vriska Serket. She's a total fucking bitch, and depending whether or not she's pmsing you two can be realy fucking tight, or you could be at eachothers throats. You hate her, but if someonelse so much as lays a fucking hand on her you'll kick their ass, so you guess that makes the two of you friends, maybe.

And then there's John. He's a cool kid, well cool isn't exactly the right word, he's a fucking dork, but you like to hang out with him and watch movies sometimes. He's hinted at having a crush on you, but it's no big deal, he'll get over it.

Of course there's alsp Nep-

" Hey Nusby! Nubsy."

You turn to see Roxy running up to you with that stupid tipsy grin of hers.

" Hey. What's up? The world finally ending?"

The girl catches up to you and links her arm through yours rolling her eyes at you and giggling.

" Sor to disapoin you nubsy, but no. Although sometin big is totes happening!"

You eye her curiously and run a hand through your hair, almost knocking off the stupid cat ears that you don't want to explain.

" Well fucking spill already. I don't have all day you know."

She looks around to make sure nobody is listening, which tells you just how big of a deal this is.

As soon as she decides the coast is clear she leans in close and begins whispering in a slurred hurry.

" We're gettin a new stuent! He's spose to be a big deal or some shi! I mean seriously! Isn this soooo cool Nuby?"

You're eyes go wide and your jaw drops, you never get new students. EVER.

This was a reall y big deal.

This also meant that Roxy was going to throw a-

" I believe tish the perfet occasion for a party! I mean, how ofen does tis actually happen!"

" Hey look it's tipsy white and one of the seven dwarves! Where are the others, Shorty?"

Vriska walked up to you and wrapped an arm around your shoulder leaning in forming a small gossip huddle.

" So what are we talking about? Anything actually worth my time?"

You glare at her and push her away, eyeing her altered uniform. Looks like it's punk pirate today. Safety pins and skull and cross bones every where, ripped up punk blue and black thigh highs with cross bones in every blue stripe under her short tan skirt, combat boots, a cute little chain necklace with a pirate hat charm dangling from it, and of course her too tight white button up with more then enough buttons undone. She looked like a slut.

" Nothing is ever worth your time, Queen Bitch. It hurts me that I cannot live up to the expectations of such a beautiful ruler, so how about you leave before i kill myself in my depression?"

She gave you her signature sarcastic smile.

" More reason to stay. What would I do if my most loyal subject killed himself? I'd be heart broken. No one needs a heart broken queen. So I shall stay with you, my lovely follower, and make sure you are completely safe. But seriously, what's with all this whispering? You two fucking behind our backs?"

You and Roxy both roll your eyes at her comment and you shoot her a weak glare.

" How elequent of yo-"

Roxys hand quickly covers your mouth before you go into some loud rant and draw attention to your little group chat.

" Nah, i don think 'm drunk enough to fuck Nusby. Although there is some pretty biiig noose. I mean news."

Vriska leaned in closer curiously, she was never one to turn down juicy gossip.

" We're gettin a new stuent!"

Vriska gasped loudly and dramatically, which caused more then a few straying eyes to glance our way.

" No way! She did that?"

She was quick to cover her trail, and the students looked away, deciding it was just some pointless chatter.

You push Roxys hand away from your mouth violently and take a gasp of air.

" I believe this conversation should be moved to a more private location."

You hiss under your breath and stomp off towards Roxys dorm, knowing the girls are following you.

If you know Roxy, which you do, the rest of the conversation is going to be about how to sneak around the staff to throw some stupid ass party.

You can't fucking wait.


	2. Gossip is Every ones Best Friend

**Why am i still doing this! Oh right, my rp partners making me...Any way it's short and shitty, not like i care. Any questions or whatever can go here okay?**

**Now I'm shutting up**

"Oh my god guys! Did you even see that Nepeta chick? I passed her in the halls this one time and she was talking in third person!"

You're name is Karkat Vantas, which should be fucking obvious by now, and you are currently in the middle of casual gossip.

It's not exactly what you were hoping for, but it's what you had to deal with until you got to a more private location.

" Oh yeah! I thin I met her 'fore! She the one thas really into cast right? I mean cats."

Roxy giggles lightly at her mistake, something she tends to do a lot.

" Yeah! That's the one! I swear she has some serious issues. I don't even think she has an alice!"

You roll your eyes at her.

" Why would she be here if she didn't have one? Think before you speak Vriska."

She shoves you in what you think is a playful manner, considering you didn't fall over and crack your head open.

" Shut up, Karkitty!"

She spits the nickname like it's venom, knowing you're sensitive about the stupid ears you have to wear.

" Blow me, Cow."

You see her literally twitch.

" You wi-"

" Guys! Shhhh! Every one's starin!"

Roxy not so casually pointed to the group of students that were watching this oh so warm conversation.

" How about all you blow hard cunt lickers mind your own fucking business!"

You shout and most of them look away still casting the three of you secretive glances.

" As I was saaaaaaaayyyyyyyying! That N-"

" Karkitty! Hi! What's up?"

Vriska was cut off by the said girl popping up out of nowhere.

She bit back the rest of her sentence and starts coughing, in a lame attempt to cover her tracks.

" Oh, hey Nepeta. Not much, like usual. How about you?"

Did you ever mention Nepeta? No? Well she's this really nice girl, you talk to her on occasion, but you're not sure if you're friends or not. Sometimes when you're bored and Roxy's in, what your little group calls, Lock Down, you'll go hang out with her and play adolescent party games, like truth or dare. She really does like cats, which is kind of funny because she has a copy cat alice. All in all, she's not that bad.

" Oh nothing really. But I did over hear the teachers talking about a-"

she shifts her eyes around the area before lowering her voice,

" New student!"

She sort of squeals excitedly and begins walking next to you.

"Sorry to break it to you, but that's old news."

Vriska exclaims and you could see Nepetas face drop out of the corner of your eye.

" No is not, though we were headin to my room to tal bout it?"

Nepeta perks back up as Vriska starts glaring a hole into the ceiling.

The rest of the walk seemed to be an awkward silence, and you were relieved when Roxy drunkenly started slamming her key into the door.

" Come on, you ca do it. Come o...Aha!"

The door finally swings open and the four of you head inside pretty much slamming the door behind you.

" So what do you guys thi-"

" Hol on, I'll be righ back."

After cutting Nepeta off she went off in the direction that you recognized led to the kitchen.

Situating yourself on the bed you grabbed one of the soft pink pillows and hugged it to your chest.

Nepeta came and sat next to you, Vriska across.

You sat like that with no words, besides Vriskas complaints, until you saw your stumbling friend enter with four sodas in her hand.

" Oky, nooooow we ca tal."

She passes out the soda and you go to open yours but stop.

As soon as she pops open the can the bitter smell of alcohol mixes into the air.

" Oh my god, you're gonna give us alcohol poisoning one of these days."

" Right. Or at the very least get us all sent to fucking lock down."

Nepeta sat there quietly watching the, sort of, conversation.

" Chill guys! Yous is tolly fiiiine! Les you wan me to-"

You throw the pillow in your hands at her and she laughs tossing it back to you.

" Geez, calm don. Okay movin on. Wha do you gus think the new kid will be like!"

" I bet he's going to be a total loser. I don't even know why we're wasteing our time talking about him."

Vriska sighed dramatically and fell down on her back, giving anyone that cared a clear panty shot.

" Nah! I heard the teachers talking about him and he sounds like he's going to be really cool."

Nepeta spoke as she leaned over and picked up one of the many stuffed cats up from the floor.

" Well I thin' hes gonna be like to'lly sexaaay! Right Nubsy~?"

She holds out her fist to you and when you blow her off her face drops, it almost makes you feel guilty.

" Aww come on! Don' 'gnore me!"

You growl under your breath and quickly fist pump her, just to get her off your back.

" Well that doesn't give us very many details Tipsy. What do you think he's gonna look like~?"

Oh god no, it's too fucking late to leave, and now you're stuck with this conversation.

" Well 'es def gonna have some nice muscles."

" And maybe a cool accent!"

Nepeta jumped in.

It's official, this is going to be the worst day of your life.

You sat there staring off into space as the girls went on describing their dream guy.

Suddenly you felt an arm hit your ribcage and you look up to Roxys signature wink, or as it's been called since she slipped up once her "wonk".

" Damn Nusby, don't start droolin 'fore you meet the guy!"

" Shut the fuck up Rox. I'm not drooling because I'm day dreaming, I just so happen to be falling asleep because of this lame ass conversation is going absolutely nowhere."

" Wha'ever you saayyy~!"

At that moment you heard the large bell ring signaling it was time for class.

" Awwwwwwww! No fair! Schools soooooooo boring!"

Your name is Dave Strider, and you can't fucking believe you're already in the principles office.

This shit is so fucking jacked.

You're name is Karkat Vantas, and you want to know who the fuck that kid was.

You were currently sitting on the roof with the majority of your group, which now included Nepeta Leijon.

Looking through the random binoculars you guys kept up there so you could spy and get some new entertainment from the students.

Except right now you didn't see the usual make outs or secret exchanges, you saw some random boy who you've never seen before tossing a can of spray paint into a nearby garbage can.

" What'cha gawking at, Boo~?"

Dave "Trickster" Strider crawled up next to you wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

" I think, it's the new kid..."

At your words the Roxy suddenly popped up and yanked the binoculars out of your hands.

" OMG! Le' me see!"

Her mouth curved into a sly smirk and she went to hand them back to you, but Daves hand shot out and grabbed them.

" Damn, so tha's what you've been starin at."

You felt your face go hot, and you prayed no one noticed.

" No! I was staring at the deliberate damage of school property!"

Dave grinned putting his hands on your face and squishing your cheeks, which was definitely not appreciated.

" Awww! Does Boo have a cute little crush~?"


	3. FUCK TITLES AND FUCK YOU

**idk whats even going on it's half assed**

Your name is Karkat Vantas and this is fucking bullshit.

For some odd unknown reason no one has shut up about the new kid, and no one has even met him yet!

Although it was time for lunch, which usually meant everyone going their own ways for a bit and meeting up later in the cafeteria.

Which is why you are currently sitting alone outside roxys dorm hall, because the bitchy staff said no boys allowed.

At least it was quiet.

" Hey Karkat!"

Or it was.

" Hey John."

The cat eared boy sat down next to you with a dorky grin.

It's not that you mind him, you just feel awkward around him sometimes.

He is a friend of yours though, for reasons you will never understand.

" What are you doing out here? I mean this is the girls dorm. Waiting to peek through windows or something?"

He joked winking at you playfully.

" Yes John, that's exactly why I'm here."

You roll your eyes standing up and stretching.

" No, I'm waiting for Roxy."

Fuck the staff. If you want to go in there you will.

Out of the corner of your eye you catch a glimpse of a not so familiar person.

It was the new kid, and you really didn't want to talk to him.

Although you couldn't help but take in his appearance.

His eyes were covered by a pair of obnoxious sunglasses, along with half his face.

He left his shirt unbuttoned and he walked like he was a fucking god.

You already hate him.

" See something you like?"

Fuck. Looks like you got caught staring.

Not that you were actually staring.

The dick maggot started strutting over to you, and coincidentally John took a tiny step closer.

" So, what's your name, cutie?"

You glare at him turning away.

" None of your fucking business!"

You walk calmly, okay actually you almost fucking ran, into the girls dorm.

" Karkat, wait up!"

John hesitates at the door before chasing after you.

Your name is John Egbert, and you are currently listening to your friend, and very very VERY tiny crush, Karkat mutter every curse word under his breath.

You aren't even sure why he's so pissed about some kid asking for his NAME.

You think you missed something somewhere along the line.

" Goddamn those fuckers! He's a total dick and I don't even fucking know him!"

Yep. You definitely missed something.

You are now Roxy Lalonde, and you can hear your best friend screaming from down the hall.

You wonder what pissed him off this time?

You hear a hesitant knock at the door, that was drowned out by a loud scream.

Opening the door you see Karkat and his friend, John?

" 'Ey nusy, wussup?"

He stomps into your room and the John kid follows, giving you an apologetic look.

" I fucking hate him! And you! And Mr. Fucking Neon!"

You blink at him, and behind you you hear someone, Johnny boy, shut the door.

" Lol, wha? Who's 'im?"

He shoots you a death glare and you just giggle and ruffle his hair.

" Who the fuck do you think?! That new fuckmaggot!"

Your name is John Egbert and you're kind of maybe a little bit jealous right now.

Why was this kid, who he didn't even know, causing such a fuss.

Oh well.

It's not like you'll let him know how you're feeling.

So instead you smile and laugh it off.

" Wow Karkat. Calm down, I think he seemed nice!"

" Shut up. He didn't seem nice. He seemed like a cocky douchebag."

He huffed and threw himself on Roxys bed, clutching a fluffy pink pillow.

It would have normally been a funny sight, but the light blush on his cheeks made your heart clench.

Your name is Dave Strider, and who the fuck was that?


End file.
